Mastering others is power, mastering oneself is true willpower.

–Lao Tzu

At the time the universe was created, it was debated to whom willpower should be given. None undertook the responsibility. When humankind – the highest of all creatures  was created, willpower was granted to it. Thus, the heavy burden that mighty mountains and  sturdy animals could not lift was placed on the shoulders of humankind.

Ever since then we roam the day with the devil of temptation on one shoulder and the angel of restraint on the other. We might have a sudden craving on the spot, or occasionally have a burning desire for something which we ardently try to hold back. It also happens that we do something knowing it will cause us harm. For example, while we are calmly engaged in discourse, a twig may provoke our anger and push us to spit it out. Conversely, we may withdraw whereas we should have outspoken the truth. Whichever outcome we tumble upon, it is not random. Our will determines our choice. The winner of this war varies depending on the strength of the desire, its importance, our energy, mood, conscience, etc.

We make choices throughout the day, major or trivial, conscious or unconscious, which nevertheless bear an effect. The effect insofar we notice it may be fleeting or lasting. We examine some of the choices meticulously and decide, whereas for some others, we say “never mind, don’t do it” or “just do it” and move on to the next one. On a typical day, it can be about calming the urge to eat another cookie, sleeping half an hour more in the morning, spending time on social media, engaging in extra-marital relationships, impulsively buying something not needed, indulging in gossip, etc. It has been calculated that a person spends an average of three to four hours a day on suppressing or self-negotiating such desires or impulses. Research shows that we experience some form of desire every two to three minutes, and most of which are the sort we are trying to resist.

Roy Baumeister, the psychologist known with his book Willpower, Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength says :

When it’s hard or a part of you wants to choose something else, willpower is the surest path to a better life.

and states that self-control is required for a good life. For example:

Being honest and avoiding the temptation to cheat requires solid self-control. Willpower is the greatest human strength, a most coveted virtue to gain inner strength, resist temptation, and pursue our lives in the direction we want.

Just as Aristotle said thousands of years ago:

The quality that distinguishes humans from animals is their reason and will. Being human depends on this. It is our capacity to guide ourselves using our reason that gives us the potential to live a better life.

Happiness – “eudaimon” in Greek is comprised of “eu” meaning “goodness” and “daimon” meaning “divinity” or “spirit”. Thus, eudaimon represents living in a way approved by the Spirit or God. Aristotle’s search for the good is the search for the highest good. All secondary goals (success, health, wealth, and other such resources) are sought because they promote well-being, not because they compose well-being.

According to him, happiness is not a virtue, it is doing virtuous deeds.

Our choices are not by chance. Even if we have parents who help us be virtuous, much of the responsibility for acquiring and practicing virtues lies with ourselves.

This begins with the awareness of the potential the human soul is entrusted with, and it is a lifelong work towards its actualization. Eudaimonia reflects the self-actualization process of humans moving towards the peak of Maslow’s pyramid. “It is human nature to strive ever higher, and human life cannot be understood unless its highest aims and aspirations are taken into account,” said the American psychologist Abraham Maslow (1908-1970). Plato describes human will in a similar way:

True prosperity and happiness come neither from wealth nor from power. Happiness is not just about satisfying the appetite. Our degree of happiness is commensurate with how humanely we live our lives. Moral thoughts and behaviors need to be integrated with our emotions and desires. Preparation for such a unity of character begins with early childhood education.

Ostad Elahi (1895-1974), the thinker, judge and musician, defines willpower as follows :

Without the celestial dimension of the human soul present in the physical body, we humans would nearly be humanoid primates having neither reason nor a moral conscience, faith or willpower… Without willpower nothing can be accomplished. In reality most of us possess willpower, for it is essential to our material life and thus can be readily put to use in our spiritual life, the failure to do so is itself a weak point.

Willpower is a psychological force that originates from the human celestial soul and functions as the executive arm of reason. Through our willpower, we can resist our instincts and abstain from that which our reason disapproves of, or alternatively impose upon ourselves that which our reason approves. Willpower is thus a psychological force originating from the celestial soul of human beings that enables us to control our instincts (unlike animals, which are subservient to their instincts).

Given that willpower is inherent to the celestial soul, everyone is endowed with it. But certain individuals are able to impose their willpower upon their ego, in which case they are said to be “strong-willed.”

A weak and dysfunctional soul is one that is unable to impose willpower of its celestial-human part upon its terrestrial-animal part. The essential function of a true spirituality is to thus strengthen the soul and render it functional so that we are able to impose our celestial- human part upon our terrestrial-animal part, i.e., to impose our inner guide upon our ego.

There are some people who devise a regular program based on specific times throughout the day. For example, three or more times daily at noon, sunset and dawn. A regular program of attention-dialogue has the benefit of gradually fostering the habit of being in a state constant attention.

Attention-dialogue  is a form of meditation that allows us to hear the voice of our inner guide and make it become second nature. Thus, it promotes discipline and strengthens one’s willpower.

A strong will does not come rolling, on its own hook.  A regular schedule with focused attention adapted to the person’s life is required. Confucius punctuates :

If you want to transform yourself, do one small thing every day… He who moves a mountain starts by moving small stones.

Duygu Bruce